These days, being friends with your kids on Facebook just isn't enough. The discerning father should know how to read between the lines of every status update, wall post and "like" – because let's face it, Facebook is relatively new, but cryptic, parent-evading slang isn't. Here are seven Facebook sex terms that dads should keep their eyes peeled for.
1."8." Sometimes used in text messages too, this is an abbreviation for "ate," or oral sex.
2. "Brown out." While its slightly darker cousin, the black out, is something that most generations are familiar with, the young ones are developing some sophisticated nuances here. Browning out refers to when you're still somewhat coherent enough to recall the past night's events – albeit with a lot of effort.
3. "Bareback." If you see this word, be on the alert – this sometimes refers to having sex without a condom.
4. "Dome." This word often refers to fellatio (and it doesn't require much imagination to understand why).
5. "FB." This could also just mean "Facebook," but social networking sites and "eff buddies" are generally not interchangeable, so be the wiser and check the context.
6. "Hook up." This may seem rudimentary, but it's what the kids these days are calling it. It's highly unlikely that this word refers to good, clean collaboration anymore.
7. "MILF." In case you've really been living under a rock, MILF refers to "mother I'd like to…" well, you do the math. In case you thought that this term died with the popularity of the American Pie movies, think again – researchers Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam examined a billion anonymous web searchers, and this provocative acronym came in as the third most popular. This probably isn't cause for concern – unless, of course, it's referring to your wife.